Thursday, March 19, 2009

Today's my birthday!

Where's my present????

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Let Sleeping Collies Lie

My cousins Essex and Deacon over at Key West Collies said that we Collies have to come up with Sleeping Collie pictures. Something about showing Sheltie people that we Collies look just as cute sleeping. Just a lot bigger with needle noses.

The thing is, I gotta confess, I never sleep alone. Usually I am sleeping with my cat Mojo. He's a pain in the Collie butt, but he's a great sleeping companion, let me tell you. Sometimes, my brother Roni joins in too. The only time $nack sleeps with me is when she has plans to trick me, but that's a whole nuther story.

So here ya go Key Westers. Here's Perfect Me and my cat Mojo, copping some ZZzzzzzzzzzs.

Sometimes, I sleep and he cleans me up, which is very cool. He doesn't like me cleaning him up though because he says my spit is sticky and then turns stiff.

This is The Woman's favorite picture of me in bliss.

The Woman calls this a Pile-Up

Ok now, here's what I call a series. Me, trying to sleep and Mojo minding my business. Note the horrified look on my face. How humiliating.


....And here I am sleeping with my large frog friend.







Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I got an award!

I didn't even do anything and I got an award from cousins Essex and Deacon over at Keywest Collies.


I mean I didn't do a thing. But that's not MY fault. It's The Woman. She is just too busy for me!

Tosca, she yammers, I am too busy to dog blog.

Tosca, she groans, Stop Whining, it is not becoming of a Collie to whine.

I'm telling you, if somebody doesn't get me out of this place, I am going to just run away. Right after winter's over, though. I mean it's rough out there. A Perfect Collie would ruin her fur and stuff. So yeah, that's it. Spring. She'll see. Boy is she gonna be sorry. I'm gonna jump the fence and go see the Old Man behind us. He always gives me chunks of ham and other good stuff that The Woman never gives me.

The stuff he gives me tastes better than those crappy biscuits she gives me anyways. And I don't even have to do fifty thousand tricks to get good stuff off the old man! Over here everying is NILIF. Nothing in life is freeeeeeee, Tosca. Blah Blah Blah. I have to practically paint a room just to get a biscuit. Over at the Old Man's place, he just says, "Tosca you're such a pretty girl! Here's ham!". Tell me THAT isn't a better deal!

Ok ok, I may not be able to take my cat Mojo with me. I mean he could come along, but I know Mojo. He gets to sleep on the bed, while I have to sleep on the floor. He gets the best food. When she cuts up chicken, Mojo gets it first in his own dish. I have to sit there like a beggar while she throws pieces at my mouth. I mean, let's face it, Mojo Rules around here anyhow. Why would he leave?

Ok so I digressed. I can do that. It's my blog. Anyways, here is the cool award I got

It's foreign! Foreign countries love Perfect Collies too, you know! It means:

"This blog invests and believes in PROXIMITY - nearness in space, time and
relationships!"

In other clearer words, "These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers! Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

You would think a taco would come with this or something. Even a burrito would be good, but nope. I just get the award. But that's ok. Awards are good. It just that you can't eat them. Well, you COULD eat them but then you wouldn't be able to prove you got an award. Besides, I'm lucky anybody pays any attention to me at all anymore, much less gives me an award. So thanks, Cousin Doogs!
I'm 'sposed to give it to eight other doogs but nobody talks to me anymore because I'm never around and I swear I'm biting my foot right now. So if you want this award, just let me know that you still love me and I will give you the award AND a taco.

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy New Year!

Man, I'm gonna get me some of that egg nog stuff!

We all got some last year but Mojo threw it up. Then I ran right over and ate it so The Woman wouldn't have to do any cleaning. It was a little warm but still good, right? So I got double my share. I hope all three of my cats throw up their egg nog tonight.

The woman says I can post This Link To Times Square, Live Stream, so you can all watch fifty zillion nutballs hang out in the cold to watch some ball fall down at midnight. Man, I wish I was allowed to go there. I bet everbody is gonna drop tons of snacks out of their frozen hands.


Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Me and The Woman and My Cats Wish You A Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to all my doog and cat and hamster and sheep and other species friends!




Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Tonsa Snow!!

I love snow! Snow was invented just for Collies! I especially love playing with The Woman in the snow. I get to knock her on her butt. I just LOVE the Thump sound she makes!

I'm in the Christmas Eve Reindeer Replacement Tryouts! I'm practicing in the snow.

Reindeer are out, Collies are in!

When did you ever hear of a reindeer rescuing somebody?

Did a reindeer ever play Lassie?

Do reindeer fetch and do tricks and play with snot-nosed kids like I do? No!

Do reindeer have to listen to somebody whine, Tosca do this! Tosca do that! Tosca do this again!

Do reindeer get lollipops stuck on them at Pet Supplies Plus?? No!

Do reindeer have to put up with cats and hairballs and the Five Razors? Do reindeer have to take the blame for everything that goes wrong because the cats say they did it? No!

I earned this!

I swear if I don't win, I'm gonna start a fire in the fireplace and when fatty comes down our chimney with his sack of crap, that'll teach him! Then next year I can have HIS job!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

It's that Elfin' time again for me and my cats!!!!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards